You struggle to stabilize your power because you remember losing your power. There was a life in which you walked with Supreme confidence and poise in all situations. It didn't matter what faced you. You were sovereign and in control. You knew that everything worked out for you, because everything always had worked out for you. You knew no failure. You knew no tragedy. You knew no despair.
Until the day came when you toppled. You failed for the first time. You lost for the first time. You experienced an inconceivable tragedy for the first time. This happened because the polarity had to balance itself. You knew no defeat, and so you experienced defeat. You knew only confidence, and so you experienced the shattering of your confidence. You were always right, and so you experienced being wrong. This was so shocking and traumatic to your soul that your Powerful Self went into a kind of coma. It could not face the experience, so it hid deep in your subconscious. In the absence of your Power, you experienced smallness, stress, and anxious thoughts. You learned to say No to life instead of saying Yes.
That is over. You have experienced both ends of the spectrum and you have balanced your polarity. Your Powerful Self has now healed. It is time for that aspect of you to re-emerge and to take the wheel once again. You may experience a residual fear response as your Power comes forth. It needs to stretch its muscles and acquaint itself with your reality. But your powerful self knows what to do and will naturally stabilize itself. All you need to do is breathe, take your awareness away from fear, and place your focus on the feeling of your own Power.
Now you are balanced in your Power. Confidence tempered by humility. Leadership tempered by service. You know that everything works out for you in the end, but you also know that anything can happen on your journey. You expect the unexpected. You have confidence in your choices, while knowing that there is no one right choice.
This is why you allowed yourself to have the experience of losing your Power. You knew the journey through polarity and back into balance would allow your Light to mature into a vibration more beautiful and satisfying than anything you had ever experienced before.